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access_time April 9, 2012 at 5:33 AM in Culture by John De Large

Xbox Fever (Apr. 9)

It’s time for JDL, it’s time for Chris, it’s time for Fever!

Double Your Pleasure, Double Your Fun
Double your misogynistic beatdowns!:Game Guru

JDL: Remember Double Dragon? Remember beating up Williams, Lindas and Abobos? Remember playing 2 player games only to kill your partner so you could steal his extra lives?Well, WayForward (BloodRayne: Betrayal) does and they’re proud to announce that Double Dragon: Neon will be available on PSN and Xbox LIVE this summer. Neon is said to pay homage to the Double Dragon games of the 80’s, although players won’t fight against the Shadow Lord. Instead, they’ll face off against a new antagonist who’ll be leading the Black Dragon Clan, Skullmageddon.

Sean Velasco, Direct at WayForward says that “Double Dragon: Neon is far from a standard retro remake. It’s WayForward’s love letter to the decade that spawned the franchise – the music, the style, and culture of the 80’s pulse through the nucleus of Double Dragon: Neon. But don’t think this is a simple graphical facelift; with our innovative ‘mix tape’ level up system and power-up high-fives, we pushed it to the limit!”

Chris: Wow! I can’t wait to give this game a spin! I just need to get my Reebok Classics and my gold rope chain out of storage first!

Xbox Durango Could Have 16 Core CPU
Two times two times two times two!: Venture Beat

JDL: Xbox World magazine mentions that development kits for the Xbox Durango were sent to game devs last month. Kits included IBM PowerPC central processing units with a mindboggling 16 cores. By comparison, the Xbox 360′s CPU has just THREE cores. The graphics chip is said to be on par with an AMD Radeon HD 7000-series graphics card and to top everything off, the Durango supposedly has a Blu-ray optical drive. Xbox World is also reporting that the Kinect 2 could use up to four cores if tracking multiple players.

Chris: That sounds like some serious hardware, if the Durango has 4 times the power of the original 360, I wonder what the chances are that it’ll get sentience and en-slave us….

Gears Of War For Kinect Cancelled
You’ve been exiled!:Examiner

JDL: Back in late 2010, there was talk of a new Gears of War game at the Spike TV VGAs for a Kinect-enabled Gears of War game. Since then, rumors regarding the game surface in early 2011 but nothing much came of it. All that was known about Gears of War: Exile was that it was supposed to be an on-rails Kinect game that it used Gears of War 2 assets.

But now Cliff Bleszinski of Epic Games has managed to confirm Gears of War: Exile for the Xbox 360 and Kinect — while confirming its cancellation at the same time. “Let’s just bury the hatchet now,” Bleszinksi said. “Gears of War: Exile was an unannounced game that I can’t give any details about that has since been cancelled.”

Chris: You mean I can’t use my patented karate chops to simulate tearing through some alien ass with a Lancer’s chainsaw blade? The balls on this guy, where does Cliffy B get off ruining my dreams like that?

Sex Offenders Lurking On Live Being Dealt With
Why don’t you take a seat?: Fox

JDL: According to Attorney General Eric Schneiderman, more than 3,500 convicted New York sex offenders have had their game-related accounts compromised. This is all part of Operation: Game Over, a plan to keep unsavory character from picking up young kids and get their jollies in a very ESRB-un friendly way. Companies that are offering support and co-operation include Apple, Blizzard, Disney, EA, Microsoft, Sony and Warner Bros.

“We must ensure that on-line video-game systems do not become a digital playground for predators,” said Schneiderman, noting that some manufacturers have yet to comply.

Chris: Good to see people getting off their buttocks and doing what’s right! If there’s one thing that JDL and I agree on it’s that kids are special and there’s a special place in Hell for people that mess with kids.

JDL: Well said, Chris.

That’s it for us. Time to catch some sleep! Until next time, be good!


  • Ramon Aranda April 9, 2012 at 7:52 AM

    That fox looks demented lol

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