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Burning Embers: F*cking Zombies in my F*cking Video Games

by on September 19, 2011
 

So what’s up with all these zombie games recently? Do game devs have nothing better to do than just to through zombie title after title at us? We’ve got Rezurrection, Dead Island, and even Resident Evil games. This is like the whole vampire scene in the movies. Twilight becomes a big hit and soon all the movie people are doing vampire films. It drove me insane.

Zombies are scary, I’ll admit. However, when you’re playing through “Zombies: The Search for More Money” the fiftieth time, you kinda just start falling asleep when attacked by the zombie horde. Hell, Minecraft on peaceful would tickle my fancy more than playing another zombie title.

I can’t put all the blame on the zombies for being un-original. After all, Pokemon uses the same animal type for ten different Pokemon and Final Fantasy uses different character skins for about twenty different monsters. But this isn’t about them, zombies, it’s about you, the zombies. So stop giving me push back!

Look, there are plenty of other equally scary monsters out there for you to exploit game developers. Try using werewolves, those aren’t tired out…yet. You could maybe even use ghosts, those wouldn’t require much animating since they would be invisible. There are plenty of scary mythological creatures that you can pull from to make a horror title. You could even make up your own imaginary creatures to terrorize people’s minds like Strongbad did when he decided to make a Dragon.

HE WAS CALLED TROGDOOOOOOOOOOOR. BURNINATING THE HILLSIDE. BURNINATING ALL THE…*ahem*

Anyways Game Devs, in all seriousness, please just stop while you’re a head (I see what you did there). Stop creating so many zombie titles before something extreme happens, like some sort of zombie simulator game or zombie sports. *shivers* Zombies are getting old, and grandpa and grandma zombie need to retire and let some hot young new horror icon(s) take the stage.

Every Monday Ember crawls from his cave to come and deliver his opinion to you the readers. His grumpy Monday attitude fuels the fire that burns onto the screen to form the weekly article: Burning Embers.

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  • Profile photo of Barnaby Jones
    September 19, 2011 at 9:58 AM

    The cool thing about zombies, and why I prefer them over most folklore monsters, is that it’s really easy to explain their ability to overrun whatever area is infected. Like ‘typical’ (the most prevalent form in movies and games) vampires and werewolves, their numbers increase through infecting others. But while vampires and werewolves generally have specific windows of opportunities to attack (during nights and full moons, respectively), zombies do not. And it’s also fairly easy to explain why they are nonexistent one month, and the next month are in the hundreds of thousands. Humans (alive or not) are damn near everywhere. And all this makes for a fairly solid game concept. A few survivors against an entire world of enemies.

    That being said, I agree that the idea has been exhausted lately and I would imagine it will die down in the next few years. Until then:

    May we all meet again in Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money

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